I thought I would write a different kind of blog this month as I am going through a difficult patch right now and have been searching for answers and for ways to help me through it.
My approach with my clients is a holistic one. I believe that to be a whole and healthy person we need to take all aspects of our lives into consideration: nutrition, exercise, sleep, stress and general mental health.
I must admit that due to my current circumstances I haven’t set foot inside the gym for at least four weeks. The most exercise I have done is a gentle walk with my ageing dogs once per day. My staple diet has consisted of cake and heated up deli meals and homemade soup – the latter being provided to me by friends.
Sleep has been, to say the least, iffy and stress… well, stress levels have been through the roof causing not only food cravings (cake) but brain fog and physical symptoms of butterflies in my stomach and burning in my chest. My moods have been up and down and have swung from happy and jolly to feeling so low that I thought my heart would literally break.
But, d'you know what? I haven’t beaten myself up about any of it. I have seen it as a time to be kind to myself and to just let things go. I have given myself permission to not worry about any of it and told myself that these issues won’t last forever and to just do what I need to do.
I have to say that after eating cake daily for about 3 weeks my body is saying enough is enough and I am naturally moving back towards a healthier eating pattern although the exercise hasn’t kicked back in yet. Time is a great healer and, although my mental pain continues and life is still highly stressful, the heart breaking moments are becoming fewer.
There IS more to life than broccoli and bicep curls as we know and I have sought solace in books on spirituality to find comfort and meaning to my circumstances. I have come to realise that I must learn real forgiveness and to feel it, not just intellectualise it. Easier said than done.
Thought provoking books I have read recently are:
Byron Katie’s “Loving What Is”
Wayne Dyer’s “Your Sacred Self”
Eckhart Toll’s “Stillness Speaks”
I would highly recommend all of them. My approach to these books is to dip in and out and gleen bits from each which I can apply to my life and which help me to move forward.
One thing I have realised recently, though, is that it doesn’t matter how big my business may grow or how much money I may have, how healthy I am, how fit I am, how slim I am, how muscular and toned I am or how young I look - if a person can’t love me and treat me with respect they never will.
You just need to look at people like Sandra Bullock or Halle Berry to know that that’s true. You can be successful, rich, beautiful and the nicest person in the world and still be treated badly. On the other hand, you might not have a ‘perfect’ body or be in for a chance to win a beauty contest and you end up with a person who will love you unconditionally and worship the ground you walk upon.
And the other thing I learned – it’s not about you (or me), it’s about them. If someone treats you badly or can’t love you it’s because of who they are inside – not who you are or what you look like.
So, if you are doing your best to live a healthy lifestyle but haven’t managed to lose the weight you think you should and you have a piece of cake as a treat (I wouldn’t recommend my cake eating regimen!), don’t worry too much about it. Just think about health and longevity rather than the unachievable standards that society and the media have decided you should look or be like because, in the end, it don’t matter a shit! You’ll be loved for who you are – not whether your thighs jiggle or not - so ditch the one-piece and don the bikini and celebrate you in all your glory. You are magnificent and don't you ever forget it!